The planet is fine. The people are fucked.
I have a original thought; it just happens to be a little blurry.
The very existence of government is a sign of failure.
You can’t be afraid of what people are thinking. You just have to do it.
Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.
Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.
Religion is like a pair of shoes. Find one that fits for you, but don’t make me wear your shoes.
The only sacred thing is the integrity of your own mind.
Its all about the money. The money! The money!
The harm is in the ignorance itself.
Dont sweat the petty things, and dont pet the sweaty things.
If you live long enough, you’ll make mistakes. But if you learn from them, you’ll be a better person.
A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.
The reason I talk to myself is because Im the only one whose answers I accept.
Life is a series of failures punctuated by brief successes.
You dont need a parachute to skydive. You need a parachute to skydive twice.
People are wonderful. I love individuals. I hate groups of people.
The English language is a language of convenience.
I don’t want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me.
You can’t take life too seriously. You’ll never get out of it alive.
Everything is okay in the end. If its not okay, its not the end.
Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass thats twice as big as it needs to be.
The only thing that can ruin a good day is the people you meet.
If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
I am not concerned about your likes and dislikes. I just want you to think.
Stupidity is the only thing a person can accumulate without any effort.
The only thing wrong with the world is that people cant recognize their own stupidity.
If you want to be a success in life, you need to be a little bit of an outlaw.
Time is a created thing. To say ‘I don’t have time,’ is like saying, ‘I don’t want to.’
When you’re born, you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front-row seat.
As long as there’s one person that you love, you’re not alone.
Youre never as good as they say you are, and youre never as bad as they say you are.
Youre only given a little spark of madness. You mustnt lose it.
It’s all about balance, really. Chaos and order, laughter and frustration.
In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.
The road to hell is paved with good intentions, and precisely what we need.
The best thing about being a parent is that you can get away with your own bad behavior.
The difference between a successful and an unsuccessful person is their response to failure.
I don’t do anything in moderation, especially moderation.
An observer is not just a passive observer; you create a narrative.
Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice.
In pursuit of happiness, dont forget to enjoy the ride.
Life is a series of choices made with limited information.
The invention of the word ‘sane’ is probably one of mankinds greatest follies.
Sometimes, the right decision seems wrong, and vice versa.